* One deck of cards
* At least three players
* Whatever you want to casually drink quickly
The goal of the game is to get rid of your cards first. You get rid of your cards by laying a higher card/cards than the ones on the table. Suits are irrelevant. Use 2's and 4's strategically to gain control and go out first. Whoever is the last person with cards is the Asshole. Don't be the Asshole.
Starting on the dealers left, deal one card at a time until all cards have been dealt. For the first round only, play begins to the left of the dealer. For all subsequent rounds, the President begins play.
The player starts by laying (face up) any single card or any set of cards of equal rank (for example two jacks, or three fives). Suits are irrelevant. Ordered Low to High - 3, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, J, Q, K, A. (Note: 2's and 4's are used differently. See 2's and 4's below).
Each player in turn must play a card or set of cards that will beat the previous play. Any higher single card beats a single card. A set of cards can only be beaten by a higher set containing the same number of cards. Example 1: If the previous player played 2 sixes you can beat this with 2 kings, or 2 sevens, but not with a single king, and not with 3 sevens (though you could play two of them and hang onto the third). Example 2: If the lead player starts with a pair of fives, the lowest thing that the next player may throw is a pair of sixes but they cannot throw triple sixes. (Singles only on singles, doubles only on doubles, triples only on triples)
If a player cannot beat the previous play or if the player chooses to pass, they must take a drink and play continues around the circle.Passing does not prevent you from playing the next time your turn comes round. Example: Player 1 puts down 2 fives. Player 2 does not have any doubles in their hand and chooses to pass (drink). Player 3 puts down 2 sevens, etc.
The hand continues as many times around the table as necessary until someone makes a play which everyone else passes and it returns to the player who played the last card/set. If that player is unable (or unwilling) to play another card, the cards on the table are cleared by the asshole (or the dealer) and set aside in a discard pile. The player who played last (and highest) on the previous hand starts again by leading any card or set of equal cards. Example: Player 2 plays 2 Aces. Player 3 can’t beat it (pass/drink); Player 4 can’t beat it (pass/drink); Player 1 can’t beat it (pass/drink). Player 2 chooses to have the pile cleared. Player 2 starts a new round with whatever they choose.
Play continues in this fashion until someone runs out of cards. That player will be the "President" for the next round and they are out of play for the rest of the current round. Other players continue to play to determine the rest of the rankings. The next person to go out is the "Vice President" and so on. The last person to go out is now the Asshole. The Asshole has duties that are explained below. (See Social Ranking below)
Once the asshole has been determined, the cards are gathered by the Asshole, shuffled, dealt, and a new round begins with the new Social Rankings in place.
2's and 4's:
2's and 4's are not used like the rest of the cards. These cards can only be played one at a time (ie, not as a pair, triple, or quadruple), however they can be laid on the pile irregardless of the cards below it. Example: Player 2 puts down 3 sevens. Player 3 can lay a single 4 or a single 2 and DOES NOT have to match the number of cards in the set below it.
During his/her turn, if a player lays a 2, the dealer (the asshole) must clear the pile no matter what. The player that laid the 2 can now lead with any card or set of cards. This can be a great way to control the table and these cards should be used strategically.
During his/her turn, if a player cannot beat the previous play or does not want to pass/drink alone or if they just want to have everyone drink, he/she can lay a single 4. This is considered a "social" in which everyone playing has to drink. These cards can be used as a "buffer" and have no rank. The next player must beat the set below it. Example:. Player 2 lays 3 sevens. Player 3 lays a single four (a social/buffer), Player 4 must beat 3 sevens. If multiple 4's are laid in a row, the last play that is not a 4 is the card/set to beat. Again, these cards should be used strategically. Remember, suits are irrelevant.
If a 4 is laid between two matching cards, the following player is skipped. (See Skips below)
2’s and 4’s are not able to be “quick-cleared.” (See below)
Optional variation: A 2 or a 4 cannot be the last card in a player’s hand. If the player goes out on a 2 or a 4, they become the automatic Asshole.
A quick-clear is when a player completes a set of four cards by quickly injecting the remaining cards of a quadruple. A quick-clear can be injected by any player at any time and it DOES NOT need to be their turn. Remember, suits are irrelevant. If a player successfully “completes the set,” the Asshole clears the pile and the player who quick-cleared can lead with whatever they choose. Example 1: Player 1 plays 2 sevens. Player 4 quickly throws the other two sevens BEFORE player 2 can make a play. The pile is cleared by the Asshole and Player 4 has control. Example 2: Player 1 plays 3 eights. Player 4 quickly throws the other eight BEFORE player 2 can make a play. The pile is cleared by the Asshole and Player 4 has control.
If there is any other valid card laid before the injecting player can quick-clear, the clear does not count and the player must pick up their cards. Timing is key and you have to be fast. It’s called a quick-clear for a reason.
Four 4's in a row do not count as a quick-clear. If a 4 (social) is laid between a set and someone attempts to quick-clear, the injecting player must pick up their cards. The 4 (social) breaks up the quadruple and a quick-clear can no longer happen. Example: Player 1 plays one seven. Player 2 can’t beat it and plays a 4 (social). Player 3 plays a single seven. Player 4 has a seven but is skipped/drinks. Player 5 plays a single seven. Player 4 is not allowed to throw their seven because the quadruple has been broken up by the 4 (social). Tough shit.
If a player lays the same card as the last card played, the next player is not allowed to play a card and must drink. Example 1: Player 1 plays a single Jack. Player 2 lays a single Jack. Player 3 is skipped and must drink. Player 4 must beat/match a single Jack. Example 2: Player 1 plays a single ten. Player 2 lays a 4 (social). Player 3 plays a single ten. Player 4 is skipped and must drink. Player 5 must beat/match a single ten.
If a 4 is laid between two matching cards, the following player is skipped. Example: Player 1 plays one seven. Player 2 can’t beat it and plays a 4 (social). Player 3 plays a single seven. Player 4 is skipped and must drink.
As players go out they are assigned a Social Ranking that takes effect immediately after the Asshole has been determined for the current round.
The first player to go out is dubbed "President." The next to go out is the "Vice President," and so on. The last player to be left with any cards is known as the Asshole.
Players must be aware of their Social Ranking at all times during the game. Commands can be given to subordinates, but they cannot be given to superiors. The President can control the table and tell anyone below them to drink. The Vice President can tell anyone below them to drink, but they cannot tell the President to drink. Control only flows down the social ladder and never up. Therefore the Asshole has to suck it up. (*except when the asshole has the cards... Keep reading.)
The Asshole is scum and has to do whatever anyone else asks (within reason, don't be a dick). The Asshole is beer bitch, answers the front door, orders pizza, whatever. However, these additional tasks cannot impede the game in any way. If the Asshole is given a task (including clearing cards), a reasonable amount of leeway has to be given before a punishment is handed out. If the task is too great or takes too long, the President can strike it down at any point.
The Asshole has additional duties. The Asshole is charged with shuffling and dealing the cards. This is the first duty of the Asshole when his/her social ranking has been determined at the end of the previous round. If there is any falter in dealing (ie. a flipped card, slide off the table etc.) the Asshole must drink. The moment the Asshole begins shuffling and dealing, the Asshole has control over the table. During this period, the Asshole can tell any player to drink, including the President.
During the round, the Asshole is in charge of clearing any cards when they need to be cleared. If the Asshole is being a drunk asshole and not paying attention, the President (or the player of their choice) can begin to count out seconds until the Asshole clears the cards. The number of seconds is the number of drinks the Asshole must take as a punishment. Higher social ranks are not allowed to clear the cards. If the cards are cleared by anyone other than the Asshole, the offending player must drink.
Note: The President will be the final say in any disputes that are not covered in these rules.
Cheating is allowed, but if you get caught, you are the automatic asshole.
Optional rule: The Asshole gives the President their highest card in exchange for whatever the president wishes to give the asshole. (After cards are dealt, the Asshole must hand over the best card in their hand to the president, and the president passes back any card they do not want.)
Optional variation: Players must rearrange themselves around so that they are seated in order of rank, clockwise.